Welcome to the Mission-Critical leadership Podcast. This is episode 1 and I’m your hose, Justin Hiebert.
In today’s podcast, I give you the overview of the Health and Integrity Pyramid that we use as a framework to create your individual coaching plan. We also talk about the purpose and calling of the mission-critical leader and set the foundation for success.
This podcast is available on all major platforms ( like Apple Podcasts), so please be sure to find it, subscribe, and leave a review.
This podcast is also interactive! I want to answer your burning leadership questions. If you have a question you want answered email me: podcast@justinhiebert.com
About Justin
Dr. Justin Hiebert works with mission-critical leaders to accomplish the unimaginable. Realizing that no leader has ever needed more things to do, he works with his clients to get the right things done. His clients rise above burnout, captivate their teams, and transform their communities. By engaging their hearts and minds, his clients unlock their full potential to be, do, and have it all. This affords them the ability to leave a legacy of influence and impact on the world. He is a husband, father, teacher, learner, and champion of joy. He resides in Bakersfield with his wife, four kids, two cats, and one dog. In his free time, he loves exercising, riding motorcycles, and anything outdoors.
Embedded within the fabric of the universe, there is a method to overcome difficulties, reframe obstacles as opportunities, and experience life-changing satisfaction no matter the circumstances. It starts, by finding joy in suffering.
Choosing Joy
I’ve written before about the phrase that’s guiding me this year. The idea to Choose Joy has radically reframed my life in the last year. No matter the circumstances, I’ve been able to experience less stress, closer relationships, a more vibrant community, more life satisfaction, and a stronger business.
It all started because I started to see joy in suffering.
That small shift has changed everything about my outlook in life.
Then, this morning, during my journaling time, I discovered the ancient secret that was at work.
Joy in Suffering
Paul, the ancient theologian and church planter, wrote to a group of churches in Rome. In the middle of his letter, he laid out the formula for growing as a leader.
Find Joy in Suffering
Use suffering to build endurance
Implement endurance to develop character
Display character to produce hope.
That’s it. That’s the formula. Four life-transforming steps.
But what I stumbled into a year ago, and realized concretely this morning, was the importance of step number one. You must first find Joy in suffering.
A Wilted Plant
Up until a year ago, I would have started at step two. I could fully admit I was suffering in life. At times it was in business. In other instances, it was personal. A time or two it was physically or mentally. Whatever it was, I could easily identify the suffering I was undergoing.
But far from joyful, I was bitter.
Angry.
Resentful at the fact I had to suffer.
And I became determined to show my endurance, in spite of the odds, to build a character and be a person of hope.
And what I realized, was that if my life were a plant, it was alive, but severely stunted.
I have a pepper plant in my backyard that I planted in a shady spot underneath a tree. For two years, I have tended to that plant by faithfully watering and fertilizing it. So far, in two years, it has produced one small and misshapen pepper.
Why?
It wasn’t getting adequate sunlight. That was the missing component. A few weeks ago, I transplanted the pepper plant, and it is already doing much better. Same soil. Same water. Now with hours of sun every day.
My life in character was the same. Was I alive? Absolutely. Was I producing “fruit”? Some, but not enough, and not fully formed.
What was missing? The sunlight. For me, it was the joy in suffering.
Reframing My Mindset
A couple of years ago, I began this transformation to intentionally alter my mood and perception of life. I was tired of being angry, grumpy, and a disappointment to be around. I knew I was isolating others … and myself … from a fully developed character.
A year ago, that crystalized into the phrase choose joy.
Now, I see what that shift has so profoundly changed my life.
Finding the joy in suffering is what allows us to not just go through the steps, but to be fully developed and thrive. We will all suffer, and we can all utilize it to produce fruit that is beneficial to others.
But the difference between those that look wilted with poor fruit, and those flourishing with a bunch of fruit, is their ability to choose joy in the midst of that suffering.
The ability to have joy in suffering is a life-altering, and world-changing, a realization that benefits you and blesses others.
As a leader, do you find joy in suffering or are you a wilted plant producing weak fruit? The choice is yours.
Recently, I was reminded about the importance of developing the process of growth and achievement.
As I was scrolling through social media, I came across the following quote:
Amateurs have goals, professionals have a process.
In the myth of new year new you, it’s popular for people to set goals. Rarely do they ever achieve those goals. Now, some are now actively warning you not to do it.
The failure to attain these goals, really to gain any motivation or traction for change, can be found in that nuance.
What makes all the difference in the world, is the process to make it stick.
Setting Goals
Here’s a quick recap on how to set good goals: S.M.A.R.T.E.R.
Specific – Is it clear?
Measurable – Can it be defined?
Achievable – Is it possible?
Relevant – Do I really want it?
Timely – When does it need to be done by?
Energy – What’s the feeling I gain by achieving the desired result?
Reward – How can I remind myself it all matters?
Notice the difference between these two “goals”
I will lose weight.
OR
I will lose 25 pounds by March 15. This will give me extra energy and confidence for the cruise my wife and I are taking to celebrate our anniversary over spring break. When I lose those twenty-five pounds, I will reward myself with a new swimsuit for the trip.
Amateurs have goals, professionals have process.
Develop the process.
Amateurs have goals, professionals have process.
To help develop the process in any goal you want to set, here are three quick questions you can ask yourself:
1.) Who do I need to become?
Goals, growth, and progress all require change. You cannot strive to attain something and remain the same. Identify who you need (and want) to become. Create the process and choices that will help you achieve the desired growth.
2.) What should I K.I.S.S.?
In this context, K.I.S.S. is an acronym for Keep, Improve, Start, Stop.
What is working well that I should keep doing? This is about amplifying the good.
What could be working better? This is about refinement.
What do I need to start? Action is key and sometimes we don’t get it right the first time. This is about continuous motion and improvement.
What should I stop? Not everything goes as anticipated. Sometimes, we just need to let it go.
3.) How will I avoid distraction?
We’re not perfect. I’m sure you’ve logged on to social media before to make a meaningful and business-related post only to be sucked in by mindless scrolling. It happens to everyone. Learning our personal triggers (being tired, hungry, bored, etc…) and building around those moments minimizes distractions and keeps us focused.
2022 is young and fresh. It is a year full of possibilities and I hope and pray the best for you. On your journey remember one thing:
The story we tell ourselves, our internal narrative about the way we are, determines the trajectory of our story.
Understanding the Programming
Early on in life, we all start to acquire an internal narrative, programming, about the way we are. This identity-shaping story becomes one of the largest determining factors in who we end up becoming. From an early age, we all start to experience those labels.
We’ve all been called things like:
worthless
good for nothing
late
nerdy
oddly small
too short
freakishly tall
too big
ugly.
The words may start off as meaningless but slowly, after hearing them enough, they become an accepted part of our worldview.
We all know the person who heard, “You’ll never amount to anything” growing up. Pretty soon, they would be saying, “I’ll never amount to anything.” In the blink of an eye, they had given up on their dreams, settled for less than they were worth, and didn’t amount to anything compared to their true potential.
It’s a heartbreaking reality for many of us.
The good news is that not only can that destructive cycle be broken, but what is true of negative stories is also true of positive ones.
Telling a Better Story
If we want to reach our dreams, we have to be willing to rewrite the story we tell ourselves.
The hard work of personal growth happens internally. Putting in the time, effort, and energy into filling our minds with good things.
It involves telling yourself:
I am competent
beautiful
loved
admirable
strong
hard-working
driven
successful
capable.
The story we tell ourselves influences the person we will ultimately become.
The Story We Tell Ourselves
I was working with a client recently on this idea and explained to him the three camps we can fall into.
1.) We have a negative story and believe it.
This is like the first example. The story we heard growing up is the story we believe. We are somehow not enough, unloved, unworthy, or pitiful.
In coaching, I see this story all the time. It’s one of the main reasons people don’t achieve the goals they start out with.
Why would a lazy, good-for-nothing, unlovable, unworthy, pitiful person try something as grandiose as starting their own business?
It probably wouldn’t work anyway.
In reality, they have everything they need and are totally capable of amazing success. The problem is not they have believed the lies.
2.) We have a positive story and believe it.
These are the fun ones. The easy ones. They already believe the right things. These people know that they are strong, competent, and capable. They are able to set goals and achieve them because they believe in their ability to accomplish hard tasks.
3.) We don’t know what to believe.
This is the place where my client found himself. The bad news was that he didn’t have a positive story about himself. However, the good news, was that he didn’t have a negative view of himself.
He was somewhere in the middle. Drifting in the open ocean with no paddle, he didn’t know which way to go. I asked him to come up with five adjectives to describe himself he knew to be true.
He couldn’t give me any.
It should be no surprise then, that goals have been hard for him. Without the confidence and clear direction of knowing what to believe, he has trouble setting and staying accountable to goals. Without knowing the truth about himself, he doesn’t know what direction to pursue.
The story we tell ourselves matters.
Get clear on what you believe, not just about the world, but about yourself.
Give yourself positive imagery to believe about yourself and put it into practice. How would you, the strong, competent, capable person you are solve this problem? Once you believe that, you’ll crush any goal in your path.
Accountability is important. Want help reaching your goals and changing the trajectory of your life? Try coaching!
… The other day, I was listening to the radio, and the host began the segment by asking, “What’s your KQ?” After a few seconds of silence, she went on to explain that KQ is Kindness Quotient. Understanding, and cultivating kindness is a growing trend. I’m 100%in.
Understanding KQ
For years, in the business world, we’ve heard about terms about our IQ (Intelligence) and EQ (Emotional) resilience. We’ve examined grit. Studies have been done on leadership capacity. You can get a degree in change management.
But recently, I came across the idea of KQ (Kindness Quotient) while listening to the radio, and I’m 100% in favor of this.
… being kind is linked to being happy. In her research, Sonya Lyubomirsky, a University of California-Riverside psychologist, found that practicing acts of kindness (as well as expressing thankfulness, gratitude, and forgiveness ) was common among happy people. Kindness seems to have a rebound effect, creating an endless loop of positivity …
I’m a huge fan of gratitude and think that consciously expressing thankfulness creates and generates more to be thankful for.
Apparently, kindness works the same way.
Intentionally expressing an act of kindness to someone generates more kindness in the world.
Random Acts of Kindness
As a child, I remember the call of a well-intentioned teacher urging me to “Go RAK someone today.” That is, engage in a random act of kindness. Their belief was that if I could do that, I would feel good, someone else would benefit, and the world would be a better place.
We even kept a RAK chart so we could see who RAK’d the most people in a given week.
Maybe she was on to something …
And now more than ever, the world seems to need a little bit of kindness.
Societal unrest.
Political Turmoil
COVID Pandemic
Fear-Filled News Cycles
Natural Disasters
The world appears to be in trouble.
And while I’m not entirely sure what kindness could do to stop a hurricane, I know kindness could help solve the rest of the problems on the list … and go a long way in recovering from a hurricane.
What’s Your Kindness Quotient (KQ)
So, what’s your KQ level?
Can you tell?
I’d like to think I’m a kind person, and show generosity, compassion, grace, and positivity in the world, but do I?
How can I tell?
In coaching, we talk a lot about investing our time and energy into the right pursuits. During one activity, we look at ways to analyze our calendar and our task list to see if our values and our time are lining up.
In many ways, we can measure kindness in the same way. Can you look back on your time, and just like you scheduled time to exercise, have dinner, return emails, and attend your kid’s practice, did you schedule a time to be kind?
Did you keep it front of mind?
Do you challenge yourself to grow and expand your capabilities?
In a world focused on division, dis-unity, and discord, focus instead on being kind, generous, compassionate, and proactively positive.
